Problems on the Olympic Torch Route

The Top 15 Problems Encountered Along the Olympic Torch Route
---------------------------------------------------------------

15) Forward progress hampered by slow moving white Bronco.

14) Torch commandeered in Waco by over-zealous ATF agents.

13) One *really* pissed off Smokey the Bear.

12) Budget cuts cause torch to be replaced by less-than-dependable Bic
lighter.

11) Difficulty getting melted marshmellows off torch after "s'mores"
party got out of hand.

10) Running 7 miles before realizing the torch is still on top of the
urinal at the last rest stop.

9) First-degree burns to runners unfamiliar with how to "receive the
baton."

8) Jim Bob, lying in wait on the outskirts of Memphis with a case of
Bud and a supersoaker.

7) Rosie Ruiz takes flame in NYC -- appears 30 minutes later in
Atlanta.

6) Drive-by goosings.

5) Torchbearers driven insane by repeated playing of the "Chariots of
Fire" theme.

4) Torch-jackings in urban areas.

3) Crazed hippie terrorists replace Olympic Torch with new Olympic
Bong.

2) Male runners repeatedly get lost and refuse to stop for
directions.

and the Number 1 Problem Encountered Along the Olympic Torch Route...

1) Obnoxious drunks who run up and yell, "No, I meant a BUD light!"
[

--
Dan Cosley (cause@coil.com)
This message, plus 85 cents, will get you a cup of coffee.



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